We choose our behavior.
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Look at the word responsibility—“response-ability”—the ability to choose your response. Highly proactive people recognize that responsibility. They do not blame circumstances, conditions, or conditioning for their behavior. Their behavior is a product of their own conscious choice, based on values, rather than a product of their conditions, based on feeling.
I choose to feel X..
Instead of saying:
That [frustrated/annoyed/angered/...] me.
OR I am [frustrated/annoyed/angered/...].
Instead State: I CHOOSE to be [xxx/yyy] by this.