Book: Influence with Integrity
Example Review of the book
Being able to not only spot, but to actually implement the nuts and bolts of the human interface is invaluable in any area where different competencies must come together for a successful business or project result. - Thomas A. Drewing
Definition: Influence VS manipulation
Influence with integrity = Achieving the other party's outcome while you achieve your own.
Achieving your own outcome at the expense or even without regard for the other party isx manipulation.
Syntonic Model
Model designed ot produce excellence in communication.
Focuses on HOW not WHAT of communication.
First step toward mastery of communication is to know what you want. (Establish Your Outcome: Envisioning Success with Clarity)
Outcome definition
Summary: Before engaging in any form of communication, define a clear, sensory-rich vision of your desired outcome to guide your actions and words.
Defining your outcome with precision is paramount to directing your efforts and communications strategically. Employing SEE, HEAR, and FEEL terms not only provides clarity but also embeds the outcome in your sensory experience, making it more tangible and actionable.
Visualize the End State: SEE
SEE Your Success
Envision the scenario in which your outcome has been realized. What do you SEE? Picture the environment, the body language of those involved, and the visual cues of success. This visualization anchors your goal in the mind's eye, setting a clear target to strive towards.
Auditory Affirmation: HEAR
HEAR the Confirmation
Anticipate the conversations and statements that would indicate success. What do you HEAR? It could be verbal affirmations, the tone of agreement, or the sounds of implementation. These auditory cues can guide the tone and direction of your communication.
Emotional Resonance: FEEL
FEEL the Achievement
Focus on the emotions you will FEEL upon accomplishing your goal. Will there be a sense of satisfaction, relief, or excitement? Embodying these feelings beforehand can drive your determination and passion, making your communication more compelling.
Integrating Sensory Clarity
Combine Senses for a Full Picture
Integrate SEE, HEAR, and FEEL to construct a comprehensive and vivid image of your goal. This multisensory approach ensures a well-rounded and deeply rooted understanding of your desired outcome, fueling your motivation and informing your strategy in every interaction.
With a clear sensory-rich outcome established, your subsequent communication becomes more purposeful and aligned, increasing the likelihood of realizing your objectives. Keep this vision at the forefront of your planning and let it subtly inform your dialogue and decision-making.
How to get your outcome.
Once you know your desired outcome. You need 3 skills in order to get it.
- Sensory acuity: Need to see and hear more than most people do.
- Flexibility: Ability to change your behavior until you get response you want.
- Congruence: All of your subpersonalities, need to agree on what you want.
Children
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