Be Tranquil

Be Tranquil.

Be Tranquil.

Be at peace with the now.

“The tranquility that comes when you stop caring what they say, or think, or do. Only what you do.” - Marcus-Aurelius

"Do not wish for events to happen as you wish. But wish for them to happen as they do happen and you will have [you will have a well flowing life]/[peace, tranquility]"

Breathe Properly

Breathe Properly

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Breathe Properly

Dont hold your breath

Diaphragmatic Breathing/Belly Breathing:

When practicing diaphragmatic breathing, the stomach, rather than the chest, moves with each breath, expanding while inhaling and contracting while exhaling. - uofmhealth.org

In simple words Diaphragmatic Breathing is breathing with your Belly, or Belly Breathing.

How to breathe | TedTalk | Timestamp:433s

Focusing on Internal Outcomes for Tranquility

Shifting focus from external outcomes to internal states like tranquility can lead to sustainable success, especially in unpredictable environments. For a software engineer, this means:

  • Prioritizing quality work processes over external results.
  • Adhering to best practices in coding and communication.
  • Ensuring a healthy work-life balance.

This approach reduces stress and increases satisfaction, as achievements are linked to personal growth and the quality of work, rather than external success markers. It integrates external goals into a balanced perspective, valuing internal well-being alongside external achievements.

"We suffer more often in imagination than in reality." - Seneca

"You have power over your mind - not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength." - Marcus-Aurelius

Be Frugal with your Fucks

The tranquility that comes when you become frugal with your fucks.

“The tranquility that comes when you stop caring what they say, or think, or do. Only what you do.” - Marcus-Aurelius

Have Low Expectations

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Having high expectations sets you up for a life of feeling like you never have enough.

happiness = reality - expectations.

Having Low Expectations that are paired with Massive Action greatly ups the probability of feeling happy.

“The greatest obstacle to living is expectancy, which hangs upon tomorrow and loses today. You are arranging what is in Fortune's control and abandoning what lies in yours.” — Seneca

“When one's expectations are reduced to zero, one really appreciates everything one does have.” — Stephen Hawking

“If you expect nothing from anybody, you’re never disappointed.” ― Sylvia Plath

“Peace begins, when expectation ends.” — Sri Chinmoy

“Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed.” ― Alexander Pope

“I find my life is a lot easier the lower I keep my expectations.” ― Bill Watterson

“You are your own worst enemy. If you can learn to stop expecting impossible perfection, in yourself and others, you may find the happiness that has always eluded you.” ― Lisa Kleypas

“When you stop expecting people to be perfect, you can like them for who they are.” — Donald Miller

“Do not extrapolate. And nothing can happen to you. Or extrapolate. From a knowledge of all that can happen in the world.” — Marcus-Aurelius

“When you let go of your expectations, when you accept life as it is, you're free.To hold on is to be serious and uptight. To let go is to lighten up.” — Richard Carlson

“Frustration is a matter of expectation” — Luis Von Ahn

“Ask not that events happen as you wish, but let your wish be that events happen as they do happen, and you shall have peace.” — Epictetus

”Trade your expectations for appreciation and you will live in a beautiful state.” — Tony Robbins

"Treat what you don’t have as nonexistent. Look at what you have, the things you value most, and think of how much you’d crave them if you didn’t have them. But be careful. Don’t feel such satisfaction that you start to overvalue them-that it would upset you to lose them."

"It is the privilege of the gods to want nothing, and of godlike men to want little."

#anti-disappointment

If Anxious

If Anxious

“Today I escaped anxiety. Or no, I discarded it, because it was within me, in my own perceptions — not outside.” ― Marcus-Aurelius

“We are more often frightened than hurt; And we suffer more in imagination than in reality.” - Seneca

IF you are feeling anxious. Ask: are you afraid of something? If so look at: How Get out of Fear state

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Reframe your way of thinking

Reframe your way of thinking, use cognitive distancing to see the same situation from a different view point.

Such as: Reframe thoughts as hypotheses

Reframe thoughts as hypotheses: Instead of treating a thought as a fact, you can treat it as a hypothesis that can be tested or questioned. For example, instead of thinking,

"I'm going to fail,"

you could think

"I have the thought that I might fail."

Now you can:

  • Distance yourself from that thought.
  • Question the thought.
Or Use the third-person perspective

Use the third-person perspective: Try to look at your situation as if you were an outside observer. This can help you view your thoughts and emotions more objectively.

Visualize your thoughts

Visualize your thoughts: Imagine your thoughts as objects floating by on a stream, or as words written on leaves that are drifting away in the wind. This can help you see your thoughts as transient and separate from yourself.

Use visual submodalities

The visualization of thoughts advise is akin to whats called visual submodalities manipulation from NLP: Neuro Linguistic Programming.

Hence, consider also consider manipulating your fears using visual submodalities to lessen the degree of your fears affecting you.

Visual submodalities are the specific characteristics of our mental imagery. This includes aspects such as brightness, size, distance, and color, as well as the motion (or lack thereof), the image's perspective, and whether it is viewed first-person or third-person.

Here are ways to adjust these visual submodalities to modify the intensity of their impact:

Increase Intensity

To intensify the emotional effect of a mental image, adjust its submodalities as follows:

  • Add motion: Make the image dynamic or moving.
  • Enhance brightness: Make the image brightly lit.
  • Enlarge: Increase the image's size.
  • Saturate: Infuse the image with vibrant colors.
Decrease Intensity

To lessen the emotional effect of a mental image, manipulate its submodalities as follows:

  • Keep it static: Make the image stationary or still.
  • Diminish brightness: Make the image dim or dull.
  • Reduce size: Shrink the image to a smaller size.
  • Desaturate: Transform the image into black and white.

Question yourself in why NOT fashion
  • Why you are not afraid?
  • Why were you afraid? What made you overcome your fear?
  • What steps have you taken mentally to move past it?

Worst case scenario tactic

Worst case scenario tactic

You can also use worst case scenario tactic. Imagine the worst case scenario. While imaging worst case and coping with it all of a sudden you realize the problem that you feared is not as large you have imagined.

In the end zoom out. Memento Mori (Remember That you will Die), what you fear now will pass.


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